Sure, those prenatal classes and baby books may prepare you for labor, breastfeeding (kind of), and baby milestones. But there are so many truly insane moments as a new parent that create a stark difference between your new life (i.e. slave to an infant) and your old one (i.e. slave to the sales days at your favorite store) and we had the best time remembering some of our favorites.
This post is graciously brought to you by one of our favorite infant brands, FridaBaby, because they not only have a great sense of humor, but they know a little something about new parent hell. Which is why they make products we’ve recommended for years, including their brilliant new Nailfrida the SnipperClipper nail care set, complete with nail clippers designed with a secret safety spy hole.
– Don’t miss a great giveaway for our readers Details below! –
Because yep, this is your life. And you now need a baby nail clipper with something called a “spy hole.”
1. The time you “sterilize” the pacifier with your mouth.
2. The time you decide you are absolutely willing to go to prison for what you will do to the delivery person who dares ring your doorbell at naptime.
Sleeping baby door hanger: Olive & Clyde on Etsy
3. The time you wipe your kid’s snotty nose with your bare hands, because it’s that or your sleeve.
4. The time you realize that you are actually cutting another human being’s toenails while they sleep.
5. The time the only thing you have to offer guests is an open bottle of wine, and cookies in the shape of Muppet faces.
6. The time you poll your Facebook friends for clever responses to, “oh, that’s a cute name for a baby! I know a dog with that name!”
7. The time you find yourself up to your elbow in toilet water to retrieve a cell phone. Or a bath toy. Or your favorite ring. If it’s not already too late.
8. The time you find yourself peeing while holding the baby because, whatever.
9. The time you spend 7 months finding the perfect Halloween costume that your baby will wear for a total of 13 seconds.
10. The time you ask whether the neighborhood bar has high chairs.
11. The time you realize the totally annoying person sharing the 16 zillion baby photos and status updates documenting every minute of every damn day…is you.
Thanks so much to our amazing sponsor, FridaBaby for making the beloved baby products that make all the caregiving gymnastics a whole lot easier. Be sure to check out their new Nailfrida the SnipperClipper nail care set, which may be the best baby nail set ever designed. The curved file is magical, and the clippers with safety spy hole let you see exactly what you’re clipping, for fewer tears. Mainly yours.
EXTRA COOL: WIN IT! We’re giving away a seriously great Bitty Bundle of Joy Gift Set full of essentials (like the cult favorite NoseFrida Snotsucker) that will make any new parent’s day. Or year. PLUS five runners-up will get their own pair of FridaBaby nail clippers.
To enter, just leave a comment on this post telling us a new parent moment or observation that made you laugh. That’s it!
Enter by Monday 9/19/16 at midnight PT. One entry per person please, 18+, US only, void where prohibited. We’ll draw 6 winners at random. Good luck!