Santa's Black Letter

Mailing a lump of coal is expensive. Send Santa's Black Letter to your naughty list instead.

With just a little over a month until Christmas, it's a great time to send a letter from Santa. In this case, not so much a typical "you've been good this year" note, but a cheeky warning message to someone who's landed on your naughty list. And we've found just the folks to do it. Santa's Black Letter is a customizable missive that arrives with all the pomp of a Hogwarts Howler, minus the shrieking. You select from three letters, choose your font, and add custom messages in the body. If you have something more specific to say, you can even write your own letter. And you can also add a Certificate of Naughty for only $2. Now, we don't advocate mailing something like this to a little kid and pushing him into a shame spiral that will have him writing maudlin poetry about you until he's in college. But if you have a whimsical teen who won't clean their room or a work friend who keeps eating your yogurt out of the fridge, it's a pretty adorable way to send a message about how bad behavior translates into lumps of coal. And my how Santa looks grouchy! Each letter arrives on beautiful letterhead with a real wax seal in matching black and a USPS postmark from the North Pole. At $9.95, it's about the price of a World's Best Boss mug from the mall store that sells black lights. And they're donating $1 from every sale to Toys for Tots. Which is pretty much the opposite of Naughty. Order your own Santa's Black Letter at their site. Letters ordered before November 25 will deliver in the first week of December. Letters ordered after that will deliver by December 20. That's still time to clean up someone's act, right?

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