I think our listeners will find this is a slightly different kind of Spawned episode than usual. It’s a lot more personal for me than most of our interviews. It was a little tough in some ways. And above all, it was inspired by a listener.
A few episodes, ago I joked about “single momming” while my partner was out of town for five weeks, and an iTunes reviewer called me out on it, saying it diminished what full-time single moms do every day of the year.
It was a fair remark (so, thanks Jennneviva). But then, the notion of what it means to be a single mom has been a complex one for me.
What I haven’t talked about on the podcast, or on this site, are the many iterations of single motherhood / solo parenting that I’ve gone through — including what changed in my life this past December when my ex, the father of my children, died fairly suddenly after a Stage 4 Lymphoma diagnosis.
While I’ve been happily partnered with an amazing man for many years who helps raise my kids (and I couldn’t do it without him), I’ve thought so much about the term “single mom” and how imperfect our language can be to describe the many types of “singleness” (for lack of a better word) that millions of parents experience.
Photos © Rachel Sklar via Instagram
In addition to advocating for single moms, she’s the cofounder of Change the Ratio, she runs the professional women’s network theli.st and is about to launch The Luckiest, a publication about single motherhood.
I think this is a seriously fantastic conversation about this nuanced topic. We may have even raised more questions than we answered, but that’s what I love about this talk so much.
Tune in right here right now.
A few topics we touch on:
-Rachel’s InStyle article Who Gets to Call Herself a Single Mom?
-The many (many) kinds of single moms, and why that’s not the most apt or inclusive term
-Solo parenting vs single parenting
-How privilege comes into play, and how race, income, and age impact perceptions of unwed mothers
–There’s a Single Mother Heirarchy and it Needs to Stop: Washington Post op-ed by Kimberly Seals Allers, author and founder of Black Breastfeeding Week.
-How the single/solo dad experience differs from moms.
-This week’s brand new DOJ proposal to permit job discrimination against unwed moms-to-be based on “religious beliefs.” The ACLU calls “taxpayer funded discrimination.”
-Why we should call our reps — and what to say. (It doesn’t have to be perfect!)
-The ways we can advocate for single and solo parents — whether we’re coupled or not.
Psst…Make sure you’re subscribed to our podcast through Apple Podcasts or your own favorite podcasting app, so you never miss an episode. And hey… do do us a solid and leave us a 5-star review! It helps other listeners find us and it’s a nice way to help support our show. Thank you!
Good related episodes to check out:
-Episode 157 : Working Mom Guilt with Katherine Goldstein
And don’t forget to join our Spawned Podcast Community on Facebook if you’d like to chat about this episode. We’d really love to hear from you.
Our awesome sponsors: BiOBUDDi Blocks
We’re happy to welcome a brand new sponsor to Spawned, BiOBUDDi blocks, from Safari Ltd. Since 1982, they’ve made the educational toys loved by parents, educators and little creators. And now there’s BiOBUDDi, the the world’s first eco-friendly toy blocks for children, all made in the Netherlands entirely from 100% recycled, renewable, plant-based materials. These learning blocks for kids 18 months to 6 years old are designed to enhance and develop children’s imaginations, while helping them build skills like problem solving, math, motor skills and in the case of the LEARNING LETTERS set, the alphabet, and reading fundamentals.
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A huge thanks to all of you who support the brands that support us!
Our Cool Picks of the Week
Also, Women.NYC is an incredible resource supporting women in business in New York City — but happens to be helpful for all women looking for funding sources, opportunities, salary negotiation tips, and other info for success.
Liz: The art of Karen Hallion is a favorite, and especially her She Series of posters and prints featuring heroines of pop culture and history.